Silent Cry by Dorothy J. Newton

Author:Dorothy J. Newton
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: ebook
Publisher: Zondervan
Published: 2015-08-01T00:00:00+00:00

I lived two completely separate lives. One life was inside my home — frightened, abused, angry, and alone. The other life was outside my home — a functional, normal celebrity wife. I remember watching the other wives and wondering about their lives. Were they happy? Were their husbands faithful? Did they struggle with abuse like I did, or were their homes peaceful? Did other celebrity wives go through abuse too, or was there just something wrong with my life?

I couldn’t wait for the season to be over. I wanted to disappear. It was getting harder and harder to hide the physical abuse, but I knew I had to. If anyone had an inkling of what was really going on, I believed Nate would have killed me.

After the Super Bowl, the Pro Bowl came around, and we went with Nate to Hawaii. For once, he was completely relaxed, and I didn’t have to worry about extra people, appearances, schedules, or endorsements. It was the nicest time I’d experienced in years.

When we returned home, the public appearances started up again, and so did Nate’s antics. Now he was constantly in trouble — with women, DUIs, and general bad behavior. In no time at all, he’d gone from media darling to media bad boy. As the press attention turned negative, his reputation suffered. The worse it got in the media, the more he took it out on me. There were times he beat me until I was unable to move. The abuse was happening more frequently, and it was getting more violent. The morning after a beating, Nate would either act as if nothing had happened the night before, or he would be extremely nice to me. I hated my roller-coaster life. I never knew from one moment to the next what to expect from Nate Newton. Sometimes I thought I would go to sleep and it would be my last moment alive.

The Cowboys continued to do well, and I was extremely busy taking care of Nate and his calendar. The arguments and beatings never stopped, so I just accepted it as part of life. Whenever he was upset, he abused me. Then he would apologize and want to “make things right.” Each time I thought, This is the last thing I’ll have to go through. And of course I was always wrong. I know it sounds crazy, but I honestly thought I deserved the abusive treatment as punishment for my sins.

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